22nd Of July

Today I went to Mid Valley with my course mates for karaoke session
We stop at KL Central to switch our transportation to KTM
Before reaching KL Central,
I saw 2 buildings that have something to do with my memories
The building of YMCA and BAC's building

That day,we do have a plan
But the weather made us cancelled the plan
The only chance for me to see you,
Is gone because of the weather
I still remember I told you that I dont know how to go to YMCA or your college
You asked me to wait for you at MCD in KL Central
But because of the weather,you cant come out to MCD
And because of all this things,I hurt you again
We never have a nice talk with each other till today because of that incident

I feel so regret
I should know how to reach your place
If I do so,
We wont come to this situation now
Things wont get worst if I know everything
It's my fault

Now I know where all the places is located
YMCA is just beside BAC,
While BAC is just in front of KL Central
I know how to reach you now
But,
Do I have the chance again??
I guess,
The answer will be no
I just wished if I can walk away from my friends and go walk around that area,
Just to hope that if I can see you
But,I had promised you that I wont do anything stupid and rush,
And the most important,
I promised to leave you alone

During the karaoke session,
My friend suddenly emo and his gf feel worried of him
They remind me of what am I on the past
I always emo and make you feel so hurt
From the different point of view,
I feel that my friend isnt doing the right thing
Because he's making us feel uncomfortable
Now,I understand how do you feel when Im emo

Nothing will change for now
You have someone in your heart
I wish I can get back your heart
But it seems like there is no place for me
All I can do,
Is to sit here silently,
Being strong to hold my tears from dropping
Being strong to prevent you from seeing the weak me
And keep waiting,
waiting and waiting

Hope you are here,
reading this..

Dear silly girl,I'm so sorry.Maybe this is the 10th times,or maybe 20th times.But,"sorry" is the only word that I can say it out for now.

I hope you will recover soon from the flu
Take a good care of your own health
I miss you so much
i'm sorry...

美好记忆

我很抱歉，
和你在一起的时候，
我无法让你有个美好的记忆。

你还好吗？
今天你一定是很累吧
希望你会早点休息
晚安，傻瓜！

不知道该写些什么东西
我的脑袋现在一片空白
很累，很累，很累。。。

。。。

你还好吗？
是不是又生病了？
你要过得比我好噢！
喝多一点水，
要多休息。

我不知道，
要如何才可以让你知道我想对你说的话
我不知道，
你是否会看看我的部落格
Haih。。。
我很孤单。。。
我很想念你。。。

Untitled Again

Hey,silly girl
I miss you so much
I dont know what else I can do to let you know that I miss you so much
I know you decided to not care bout me anymore
And pleased me to leave you alone
Today,I told someone about 1 theory

"The most painful wound is not on human body,but it's on human heart"

Deep inside my heart，
I feel so painful
Pain because I can't be with you
Pain because I can't talk to you
Pain because I can't laugh with you
But,I don't mind to be painful
Because it's worth for me to do so

I love you,
Just like how much you love the guy in your heart now
But the difference is,
I can't show my love anymore like before this
I can only love you silently
Letting you go to someone who you love
I can only sit here and wish that you will find your happiness,
Without you knowing that how much I want,
To be the guy that can bring you happiness
I had gone through a lot of things,
For myself,
And for you

I miss you so much
Only God who will understand my feeling
On the past,you always make me believe in miracle
And now,
I just wish miracle will happen again
Day by day,
Im holding my phone,
Just simply wish that I will receive text from you
I wish you will ask,
"Fei Zai,how have you been??"
I wish I can reply,
"Silly girl,Im fine.Hey,do you know that Fei Zai miss you so much ??"

Dear Blog,
Today is the 1st time my tears drop from my eye,
Together with every words for this post
You are the only one who can understand my feeling
Thank you for willing to lend me some space for me to cry and write out my feelings

Untitled

When I am down and, oh my soul, so weary;
When troubles come and my heart burdened be;
Then, I am still and wait here in the silence,
Until you come and sit awhile with me.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up... To more than I can be.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up... To more than I can be.

There is no life - no life without its hunger;
Each restless heart beats so imperfectly;
But when you come and I am filled with wonder,
Sometimes, I think I glimpse eternity.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up... To more than I can be.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up... To more than I can be.

You raise me up... To more than I can be.

Not sure what happened to me
I just dont feel so happy
Lonely is all I can say

Hello

Im here again
Not happy recently
I found out the truth after 6 months
I always hoped that you will tell me the truth
And finally,
You did it
I thought I'm supposed to be happy
But I'm not
You brought me another sad news
Maybe for you,
You will feel better after telling me
But for me,
I doesnt feel happy

I just hope I can spend more time with you
I wish I can be the one who you need
I'm not going to give up
Because you are the one I wish to have for my lifetime
I know,
For you,my words now wont give any meaning for you
But for me,it does bring a lot of meaning

3 days passed
Vad is not here
I do really really feel lonely
No one to talk with all the day after classes
This is the 1st time I feel that lonely
I wish you are here for me
You are the only one left that understand me the most
I miss you
I miss Vad too
I miss Becca and Pui Kei too
I hope I can be with you all
Like how we usually hang out together after school
Having bugger at McD during lunch,
Hang out in library together,
Chit-chatting in U6S2,
And many more sweet memories

Im currently listening to "You Raise Me Up"
This song means a lot for me
You brought me to this song
I sang that song most of my time in NS,
So that I can remember you,
The way you raise me up
Now,I'm still listening to that song,
Because this song raise me up,raise my perseverance,my mind and my heart
This song let me know how much important you are for me
I'm being silly
I drops my tears every time this song sang itself in my mind
No other words that I can use to express my feeling

I feel so lost
I dont want to get lost
I just want to stay here
Fight for what I want
Fight for what I think is worth for me
But,
Can I cry just for a while ??

Tired

Don't know why,
But recently,I easily feel so tired
I'm not sure what is going on
But I'm tired

"I hope you wont forget or ignore me because it's pain. "

Good night!

Programming

Will be having programming test tomorrow
Now,my head is going to be explode
I feel so stress :(
Private stuff and study stuff
All together in my head
Make me feel like want to kill myself
Haih
Not in mood to blog
:(

5th Of July

Went to college like normal
Programming at morning
I skipped my lecture today because my whole gang want to drink "Orange" juice
So,i just follow the flow
Have our lunch at TBR before that
And we stay at Orange till 3.30p.m
Went back to college for our Fund. Maths exam
The test was okay okay
Almost hang me up!!
Finished our test at 6p.m and I went back to hostel
Well,thanks God because there is someone in my block get a WIFI but he didn't put password on it
So,I managed to online in room till now
Im bored in room
Will have another test on Wednesday which is Programming
Need to study hard on this :(

I miss you so much :(
"I really miss the way you look me in the eyes..The way you laugh,talk,smile..When I'm with you my heart pounds fast..When we're apart my heart rips in two..All my life I never thought I'd feel this way.. "
I wish you will talk to me :(
Please dont ignore my existence

Mid-Term Exam

Wow,so fast
Mid Term test start on tomorrow
Didn't study much for my so-called holiday
Not in mood for study
Well,just bald my hair again
As I said,
Appearance doesn't look important for me
People wont fall in love because of your hair
No matter what,they love you because of your heart
I feel better with my natural look
Hence,I decided to maintain my bald head forever

"If you want to make your dreams come true, the first thing you have to do is wake up. "

I really do hope my dreams will come true.Im willing to wake up and face all the obstacles in my life.I wouldn't be afraid of any obstacles.Stay strong,me!!

Heading back to hostel soon
Take care everyone!

Missing

Is been like a week you didn't text with me
I know it is my fault after all
But,I can't deny that I miss you so much
I guess you will still ignore this
I know you hate me
As long as if you will feel better,
Im willing to be hate by you forever

"Effort is only effort when it begins to hurt. "

Yes,its hurting me.But I don't mind if my effort will change everything.No matter what,perseverance will be my motivation.

Will be having exam on next week
Hope I can get good result for the test
Fundamental Mathematic and Programming written test
Is time to get more serious

Have a nice day everyone!

Tired

Yeah
Im getting more tired this few days
Class finish at 2p.m today
I slept from 4p.m till 8p.m
And skip my dinner because I dont feel like want to eat
I need more rest
Hope tomorrow will faster end so that I can go back to home and rest for few days

Nobody trips over mountains. It is the small pebble that causes you to stumble. Pass all the pebbles in your path and you will find you have crossed the mountain.

There is a mountain in front of me.But there's lot of small pebbles that be the obstacles.I will pass all the pebbles and cross the mountain successfully

Wednesday

Today finished class at 12p.m
Last class is the tutorial and practical for Programming
After the class,I rushed to JJ to meet up with Becca and Vad at 1p.m
But at last,everyone end up coming late,approximately 1.30p.m
Meet up with Mei Seen and later on,we walked to school together
Went there to walk around and visit few teachers
After lotsa bla bla bla bla,
We end our school trip and went to Pavillion for movie
Toy Story 3 was our last minute decision
The story overall is good
And to be honest,I almost drop my tear during the ending part
Seeing Woody and the gang are always together to face obstacles,
Andy who finally grown up and have to leave all his toys,
This story teach me to appreciate everyone that always be by my side

Finished movie at 7p.m
Went to Sungei Wang because Mei Seen planned to meet her friend over there
And,it is our farewell place too
Mei Seen will be going to Terengganu for futher studies in local U
Honestly,I will be missing her after she leave
I know her during my time hanging around in U6S2 everyday after I retired from RCP Board
She is kind and cute girl for me
She is good in arts too
Mei Seen,if you are reading my blog now,
Just want to tell you that I will miss you so much
Good Luck in your study ya!! Gambateh!!!

Well,is been like 3 days I didnt msg silly girl
I dont wish this will stay long
Hope to get through this without any problem

"If we are facing in the right direction, all we have to do is keep on walking. "
I do hope I face in the right direction.And I will make sure that I will reach the end of this path.God,please bless me.

Have a nice day everyone ;)