Honestly

I feel happy to celebrate Christmas with you and the others
But at the end, the jealousy came back to me again
I always tried my best to get your attention
But it is obvious you don't really pay much attention on me
And you pay more attention to him
That's what I feel now
I wish you would know how I feel
I wish I'm brave enough to tell you what I feel
:(

Pathetic Week

What a pathetic week
Been over stressed on Monday till Wednesday because of the Web Development Assignment report
My face ate a ball during water polo session on Wednesday and my head ate a steel at the same time too
And today I'm officially bankrupt for real
Bout 3 packs of xxx from xxx which cause me RM 50++ while I only left RM 50 in wallet
Thx god my dear Becca borrow me RM 20 or else I'm gg.com
Hope tomorrow will be a fine day for my class outing ^^
Peace out
/wahaha

烦恼

这几天，
我都在烦着某些事情。
姐姐今天问了我一个问题，
“你对她的感觉是真的吗？要想清楚噢。。”
我没回答她。
在回家的路程，我一直都在想我心目中的答案。
说真的，被人拒绝了四次，
我什么感觉和经验都已经受过了。
伤心和痛苦都随着我度过人生
可是，被人拒绝了四次，
我学会了很多东西。
勇敢，忍耐，不放弃的精神，和人生道理。

其实，
我很想和她告白。
我对她的感觉是真的。
因为我从来都不会把感情当成个玩笑。
可是，
如果我被拒绝，我就会再受到痛苦。
如果没被拒绝，我就会怕我无法让她每天都觉得开心。
真是很烦。。。
Haih。。。

Stress

Recently,I'm stress
Wish you know that I care bout you
Wish you know that I'm fall in love with you
Wish you can hear me
Wish you will read this
Jealousy is torturing

Unexpected Saturday

Today plan was to go to  Oldtown near Midah there with Vad,Becca and Amma (Vad's Mom)
So, we reached there around 4.30p.m
Chit-chatting at there till 6p.m
Me and Becca went to Leisure Mall to watch movie
But Harry Potter doesnt wait for us
We did weird decision and went to Pavilion
Luckily, there is Mr Potter waiting for us in Pavilion at 9.30p.m
Finished the movie around 12a.m
And Shera drove me home
Kinda sleepy now to be honest
What an unexpected Saturday to be honest
/wahaha

Long Time

Yeah! I know!
Is been long time I didn't blog
Can be said,I'm lazy
What's new about me??
Not much to be honest
Trying my best to love a girl (well,of course she doesn't know it)
Trying my best to figure out why I'm easily get sick recently
Trying my best to complete all the assignment
A busy and challenging life I can say
Wish me luck!

I wish I could make a wise decision
Love is not that easy
You have to face jealousy, disappointment and pain
Should I just confess to her so that I can avoid all these things?
I wish I am brave enough to tell her,
"Yeah.I love you!"

P.S : I have finally deleted all the message that I had kept for almost a year.A step to move on I guess.

Day before Birthday

Yeah..
Gonna hit 18 after today
I understand that Vad is being busy with her STPM,
Becca is busy with her exam
While Pui Kei is busy with her hypnosis course
To be honest,
I almost cries when becca apologize for not being able to celebrate my birthday
But I just remain silent
Last year,
Someone promised me,that I wont feel lonely anymore while celebrating my birthday every year
Past 16 years,I never give a shit for my birthday celebration
I never hope for it too
Because of your promise,I truly appreciate what you had done last year
And I always hope you will fulfill your promise every year
Because of your promise,I even rejected my friend's plan
But now,I'm just nobody for you to remember your promise
I will just back to old life
Years by years without birthday celebration
Birthday will be a day for me to dislike
A day for me to be alone
As I said,promise is something that is full of shit

其实

无论如何，我的心，有时候，还是会觉得痛。。。
:(

Relaxing Friday

Kinda relaxing for today
Have lunch at MCD with Jie Jie,Miao,Meng How,Rebecca and Kelly
But before that,
Miao,jie jie and me went to buy Donashi from Big Apple
Kinda cute leh ^^

Donashi!! Each person bought 3 ^^

Their plastic bag's design are very special too

After that,we went to MCD for our lunch
Bought McChicken Supreme while both of them have Spicy Chicken McDeluxe
Kinda delicious too :P

Yummy ^^

So,yeah..
Overall,is a superb day
Thanks to Miao and jie jie :)

Template

Temporarily using a new template
Dont think this template exist yet
 /blush
Since I have edited some code
So,half copyright by me!! :P
Feel so headache after coding
zzzz

没用的我

真是没用的我。

没想到，我变成了个傻佬，为了一个女子，在 youtube 听了差不多８０首歌

８０首！！！　可是也还是找不到她想要的歌。。

她是谁？

自己去找答案吧！

我酱做，都不知道值得还是不值得。。

可是我说过了，要尽力地去让她开心

明天再努力继续找吧！

丽宇受伤了。

看了她的照片，自己觉得很心痛。

想说声几句话，可是又怕打扰了她。

我已经尽量的不去骚扰她了。

说过要让她做她想要做的事情。

我不会去想那么多。

简单一点来说，我不想去理那么多

她有自己的世界，朋友，等等。

她还当我做朋友，我已经算好运了

做人不应该要求高

她愿意向我问好，我都已经满足了

丽宇，早日康复吧！

Happy Go Lucky

I'm glad to have you back

Although I still feel abit uncomfortable,

But I try my best to ignore the feeling

I'm glad you willing to make this decision to start all over again

Maybe you might not know,

But I think is time for me to sit back,relax and see what kind of changes you want to bring

This time,I'm not going to be the one who do alot of stuff in order to closer our friendship

Because last time when I do that,I had been through a hell life for 10 months

Now,I'm going to let you do what you think is the best for our friendship

I will just follow the flow

Thanks,Princess Sally!! 

:) 

Tuesday post

I cant think any suitable title for today post
The lab test for today was so-so
I think I can survive for this time
Haih
Not in mood to elaborate more about today
But I feel sad,guilty and bad for myself
I guess I pissed Maryann off badly today :(

First time went out with her and the U3 group,
Her attitude grabbed my attention
She was pissed of something during that day
So,I can see the not-in-mood expression
A quick thought appeared and told me to make her smile
And I did it for sure
A combination of mee and ice cream do really make her smile because of my stupidity
Finished our lunch,we walked around in Lot 10,Sungei Wang and Times Square
And I did it again
Tried to catch up with her while walking

From that day,
I get a new friend and I wish to make her smile everyday
So,yeah..
I did it by started to chat with her in facebook,or even make jokes during classes or tutorial
And she smiled
Feel glad to see her smiling face till now

But today,
I might overdid something and pissed her off
I'm not sure what's the problem
But I'm sure I'm one of the reason she feel so pissed
I feel so bad and guilty
And as what I said to Yen Ling,
Is been long time I never feel emo because of a friend
So,Maryann become the 1st friend to make me feel so emo for this whole night with Ookami and Miao
I have to say this,
Maryann is truly a good friend for me

To Maryann,if you read this
Dear Maryann,i love to see you smile everyday because your smile is adorable and it's make us feel happy too.But I know today I might overdid it and hurt your feelings.I'm truly sorry for what I had done.I hope you will forgive all of us,the U3 group.

I am sorry,Maryann

Good night!
Sleep tight and sweet dreams everyone

Rushing Week

Seems like this week gonna be a rushing week
Well,today classes was so-so
Started to program the PCD Assignment 2
Kinda hectic
Web Development started to touch CSS code
Have to digest those notes and skills
Replacement for ITB tutorial tomorrow
Web lab test tomorrow
Gheez..STRESS
Wednesday nothing special (hope so) except swimming training
Thursday not much except no English
And Friday gonna spend my whole day at Dodo's house for Diwali
Peace out...

Tired

Getting tired recently
Many things have to be done for my course
Started to feel stress and so on
Hope I will overcome it :(

U3

So,what's U3??
Apparently,U3 is my class
To be honest,my class are full with bunch of crazy friends
Went to Shabu Shabu last friday with them
An enjoyable outing

Hak Lee,Wit Jian,Meng How,Sin Hon,Me,Yen Ling,Rebecca,Jia Le,Le Yue and Maryann

    

Ah Hong with his crazy act

Bunch of carnivores XD

Overloaded steamboat :D

A nice pose ( Ti Hao,Meng How,Xian Feng,Wit Jian,Sin Hon,Me,Chuan Yi.Hak Lee,Jia Le,Yen Ling)

Went to Grand Season Hotel yesterday for hi-tea session with PSS

Kinda bored to be honest

That's all from me

Nitez

So

So,yeah
I bought a PSP
Black color
Currently addicted to the games
So,yeah
New life begin

Morning

1st time make a post early in the morning
Having much pain because of the ulcers
Didn't talk much in classes yesterday
Quite silent for the whole day
Yeah,is torturing
Hope it will get better soon
Have a nice day ;)

Just a Thought

Been sick for whole day
Woke up 6a.m early in the morning
Supposed to have IB(Introduction to Business) lecture today at 9a.m
But Mr.Teo suddenly on leave and SAS office informed us last minute when half of the lecture hall are full
Well,it doesn't bring bad news for me too
Me,Hong and Seak took this opportunities to finish our assignment layout
Yeah..the layout for our webpage is done I guess
Now,all we need to do is to think smart of how to dig out some html code from webpage
Being silent for this whole day
Not feeling well as I said
Reached home at 6p.m
Finish all stuff and had a bad flu for few hours
But thanks to my Vad,
I manage to do something with the bad flu
Love you Dodo!!
Just took my medicine
I guess the effect might taking place soon
Time to sleep
Nitez...

Weakling Me

Im sick
Flu and sore throat
Remind me of the day when you accompanied me day by day,
Gave me encouragement to get well soon
But now,
I'm all alone
I should go to bed now
Bye

Random

Yeah... :)
Random post
College's life getting more tired
Most of the days,
I need to go back at 5p.m

To be honest,
I have no idea what to post in here
I slightly feel that I wanna talk stuff bout my life recently
So,let's see how far I can go with today post
Glad to have Vad accompany me day by day,
From morning till night..
That's my lovely sister as usual
Becca started her university life recently
I'm pretty sure she will be getting tired
Pui Kei went for a Hypnosis course
She told me that she is now able to make someone get into a very relax mode
I hope when she start to learn the real hypnosis,
She won't turn me into a chicken or duck
Michelle gonna end her secondary school's life
Yeah.
Is time for her to go for a higher level of life
Hope she will be doing fine for her SPM

Is hard for me to pretend that I hate Lai Yee
Is difficult for me to not think of her
But,since she doesn't want me in her life anymore,
I can't do much things except just carry on my daily routine
Sadness is still with me
Is not that I'm still the emo-type people,
But,when you did something that really make you feel regret,
That's what you will feel
Pain,sad,guilty and regret for the rest of my life
These feelings will stay with me until the end of the world
No one could really understand how I feel
Not even myself

Time to sleep,Fei Zai
Good night
Sleep tight and sweet dreams

Passing By

Yeah...
I'm pretty sure this blog is full of dust
Is been a long time I didn't touch this memorable blog
The blog of my life
I'm not sure what's the reason I'm back
I just feel like want to write something today

Life's is moving on
I'm not sure what am I anymore
Living my life with no any special feelings
Do my daily routines with no any special feelings
Can be said,
A living human being without soul

Kthxbai

真夏的樱花

笑一个吧亲爱的朋友啊
把悲伤留在昨天锁上
还记得那些我们说过的梦想
你的笑脸灿烂如花
总有一天你我会再见面啊
虽然要向着樱花各奔天涯
岁月或许会改变你我的模样
我的思念永不放假
明天的世界等待我们拥抱它
在我心中装着你祝福的话
Sakura sakura
洒满青春的魔法
擦干眼泪说声再会都是成长的代价
Sakura sakura
昂首风雨中有爱我最大
期待他日花开的季节里回家

傻瓜，对不起。。。

Hi

Hi blog
Seems like I had abandoned you for a long time
The reason is because I just want to keep my feelings in myself
But I know,
I wont make it
And now,I'm here looking for you
Just to release my stress

What had happened to me??
Lai Yee decided to hate me
The most worst problem I ever faced
Day by day,
I'm there looking at every single update bout her in Facebook
It's obvious that,she had changed alot
She have more friends now
Everything she posted in facebook,it's all bout her new friends,her new lives
I guess,she really do forget bout me

Blog,
I miss her so much
I really do miss her so much
Can you tell her that I miss her?
Can you tell her that Fei Zai wish she wont hate him anymore?

Blog,
Tell me,
What should I do so that she wont hate me and willing to be friend with me??
It's very pain for me to let go of her

Blog,
Thanks for lending me a space to voice out my feelings
I appreciate it so much
Hope to see you soon

话

很想说些话
可是我知道，我的话无法改变事实
我生病了。
我很想念你。。。
:(

22nd Of July

Today I went to Mid Valley with my course mates for karaoke session
We stop at KL Central to switch our transportation to KTM
Before reaching KL Central,
I saw 2 buildings that have something to do with my memories
The building of YMCA and BAC's building

That day,we do have a plan
But the weather made us cancelled the plan
The only chance for me to see you,
Is gone because of the weather
I still remember I told you that I dont know how to go to YMCA or your college
You asked me to wait for you at MCD in KL Central
But because of the weather,you cant come out to MCD
And because of all this things,I hurt you again
We never have a nice talk with each other till today because of that incident

I feel so regret
I should know how to reach your place
If I do so,
We wont come to this situation now
Things wont get worst if I know everything
It's my fault

Now I know where all the places is located
YMCA is just beside BAC,
While BAC is just in front of KL Central
I know how to reach you now
But,
Do I have the chance again??
I guess,
The answer will be no
I just wished if I can walk away from my friends and go walk around that area,
Just to hope that if I can see you
But,I had promised you that I wont do anything stupid and rush,
And the most important,
I promised to leave you alone

During the karaoke session,
My friend suddenly emo and his gf feel worried of him
They remind me of what am I on the past
I always emo and make you feel so hurt
From the different point of view,
I feel that my friend isnt doing the right thing
Because he's making us feel uncomfortable
Now,I understand how do you feel when Im emo

Nothing will change for now
You have someone in your heart
I wish I can get back your heart
But it seems like there is no place for me
All I can do,
Is to sit here silently,
Being strong to hold my tears from dropping
Being strong to prevent you from seeing the weak me
And keep waiting,
waiting and waiting

Hope you are here,
reading this..

Dear silly girl,I'm so sorry.Maybe this is the 10th times,or maybe 20th times.But,"sorry" is the only word that I can say it out for now.

I hope you will recover soon from the flu
Take a good care of your own health
I miss you so much
i'm sorry...

美好记忆

我很抱歉，
和你在一起的时候，
我无法让你有个美好的记忆。

你还好吗？
今天你一定是很累吧
希望你会早点休息
晚安，傻瓜！

不知道该写些什么东西
我的脑袋现在一片空白
很累，很累，很累。。。

。。。

你还好吗？
是不是又生病了？
你要过得比我好噢！
喝多一点水，
要多休息。

我不知道，
要如何才可以让你知道我想对你说的话
我不知道，
你是否会看看我的部落格
Haih。。。
我很孤单。。。
我很想念你。。。

Untitled Again

Hey,silly girl
I miss you so much
I dont know what else I can do to let you know that I miss you so much
I know you decided to not care bout me anymore
And pleased me to leave you alone
Today,I told someone about 1 theory

"The most painful wound is not on human body,but it's on human heart"

Deep inside my heart，
I feel so painful
Pain because I can't be with you
Pain because I can't talk to you
Pain because I can't laugh with you
But,I don't mind to be painful
Because it's worth for me to do so

I love you,
Just like how much you love the guy in your heart now
But the difference is,
I can't show my love anymore like before this
I can only love you silently
Letting you go to someone who you love
I can only sit here and wish that you will find your happiness,
Without you knowing that how much I want,
To be the guy that can bring you happiness
I had gone through a lot of things,
For myself,
And for you

I miss you so much
Only God who will understand my feeling
On the past,you always make me believe in miracle
And now,
I just wish miracle will happen again
Day by day,
Im holding my phone,
Just simply wish that I will receive text from you
I wish you will ask,
"Fei Zai,how have you been??"
I wish I can reply,
"Silly girl,Im fine.Hey,do you know that Fei Zai miss you so much ??"

Dear Blog,
Today is the 1st time my tears drop from my eye,
Together with every words for this post
You are the only one who can understand my feeling
Thank you for willing to lend me some space for me to cry and write out my feelings

Untitled

When I am down and, oh my soul, so weary;
When troubles come and my heart burdened be;
Then, I am still and wait here in the silence,
Until you come and sit awhile with me.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up... To more than I can be.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up... To more than I can be.

There is no life - no life without its hunger;
Each restless heart beats so imperfectly;
But when you come and I am filled with wonder,
Sometimes, I think I glimpse eternity.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up... To more than I can be.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up... To more than I can be.

You raise me up... To more than I can be.

Not sure what happened to me
I just dont feel so happy
Lonely is all I can say

Hello

Im here again
Not happy recently
I found out the truth after 6 months
I always hoped that you will tell me the truth
And finally,
You did it
I thought I'm supposed to be happy
But I'm not
You brought me another sad news
Maybe for you,
You will feel better after telling me
But for me,
I doesnt feel happy

I just hope I can spend more time with you
I wish I can be the one who you need
I'm not going to give up
Because you are the one I wish to have for my lifetime
I know,
For you,my words now wont give any meaning for you
But for me,it does bring a lot of meaning

3 days passed
Vad is not here
I do really really feel lonely
No one to talk with all the day after classes
This is the 1st time I feel that lonely
I wish you are here for me
You are the only one left that understand me the most
I miss you
I miss Vad too
I miss Becca and Pui Kei too
I hope I can be with you all
Like how we usually hang out together after school
Having bugger at McD during lunch,
Hang out in library together,
Chit-chatting in U6S2,
And many more sweet memories

Im currently listening to "You Raise Me Up"
This song means a lot for me
You brought me to this song
I sang that song most of my time in NS,
So that I can remember you,
The way you raise me up
Now,I'm still listening to that song,
Because this song raise me up,raise my perseverance,my mind and my heart
This song let me know how much important you are for me
I'm being silly
I drops my tears every time this song sang itself in my mind
No other words that I can use to express my feeling

I feel so lost
I dont want to get lost
I just want to stay here
Fight for what I want
Fight for what I think is worth for me
But,
Can I cry just for a while ??

Tired

Don't know why,
But recently,I easily feel so tired
I'm not sure what is going on
But I'm tired

"I hope you wont forget or ignore me because it's pain. "

Good night!

Programming

Will be having programming test tomorrow
Now,my head is going to be explode
I feel so stress :(
Private stuff and study stuff
All together in my head
Make me feel like want to kill myself
Haih
Not in mood to blog
:(

5th Of July

Went to college like normal
Programming at morning
I skipped my lecture today because my whole gang want to drink "Orange" juice
So,i just follow the flow
Have our lunch at TBR before that
And we stay at Orange till 3.30p.m
Went back to college for our Fund. Maths exam
The test was okay okay
Almost hang me up!!
Finished our test at 6p.m and I went back to hostel
Well,thanks God because there is someone in my block get a WIFI but he didn't put password on it
So,I managed to online in room till now
Im bored in room
Will have another test on Wednesday which is Programming
Need to study hard on this :(

I miss you so much :(
"I really miss the way you look me in the eyes..The way you laugh,talk,smile..When I'm with you my heart pounds fast..When we're apart my heart rips in two..All my life I never thought I'd feel this way.. "
I wish you will talk to me :(
Please dont ignore my existence

Mid-Term Exam

Wow,so fast
Mid Term test start on tomorrow
Didn't study much for my so-called holiday
Not in mood for study
Well,just bald my hair again
As I said,
Appearance doesn't look important for me
People wont fall in love because of your hair
No matter what,they love you because of your heart
I feel better with my natural look
Hence,I decided to maintain my bald head forever

"If you want to make your dreams come true, the first thing you have to do is wake up. "

I really do hope my dreams will come true.Im willing to wake up and face all the obstacles in my life.I wouldn't be afraid of any obstacles.Stay strong,me!!

Heading back to hostel soon
Take care everyone!

Missing

Is been like a week you didn't text with me
I know it is my fault after all
But,I can't deny that I miss you so much
I guess you will still ignore this
I know you hate me
As long as if you will feel better,
Im willing to be hate by you forever

"Effort is only effort when it begins to hurt. "

Yes,its hurting me.But I don't mind if my effort will change everything.No matter what,perseverance will be my motivation.

Will be having exam on next week
Hope I can get good result for the test
Fundamental Mathematic and Programming written test
Is time to get more serious

Have a nice day everyone!

Tired

Yeah
Im getting more tired this few days
Class finish at 2p.m today
I slept from 4p.m till 8p.m
And skip my dinner because I dont feel like want to eat
I need more rest
Hope tomorrow will faster end so that I can go back to home and rest for few days

Nobody trips over mountains. It is the small pebble that causes you to stumble. Pass all the pebbles in your path and you will find you have crossed the mountain.

There is a mountain in front of me.But there's lot of small pebbles that be the obstacles.I will pass all the pebbles and cross the mountain successfully

Wednesday

Today finished class at 12p.m
Last class is the tutorial and practical for Programming
After the class,I rushed to JJ to meet up with Becca and Vad at 1p.m
But at last,everyone end up coming late,approximately 1.30p.m
Meet up with Mei Seen and later on,we walked to school together
Went there to walk around and visit few teachers
After lotsa bla bla bla bla,
We end our school trip and went to Pavillion for movie
Toy Story 3 was our last minute decision
The story overall is good
And to be honest,I almost drop my tear during the ending part
Seeing Woody and the gang are always together to face obstacles,
Andy who finally grown up and have to leave all his toys,
This story teach me to appreciate everyone that always be by my side

Finished movie at 7p.m
Went to Sungei Wang because Mei Seen planned to meet her friend over there
And,it is our farewell place too
Mei Seen will be going to Terengganu for futher studies in local U
Honestly,I will be missing her after she leave
I know her during my time hanging around in U6S2 everyday after I retired from RCP Board
She is kind and cute girl for me
She is good in arts too
Mei Seen,if you are reading my blog now,
Just want to tell you that I will miss you so much
Good Luck in your study ya!! Gambateh!!!

Well,is been like 3 days I didnt msg silly girl
I dont wish this will stay long
Hope to get through this without any problem

"If we are facing in the right direction, all we have to do is keep on walking. "
I do hope I face in the right direction.And I will make sure that I will reach the end of this path.God,please bless me.

Have a nice day everyone ;)

What Am I Doing?

Haih
Dont know what am I doing recently
I guess I must be stress of college's stuff and some private stuff
Hope I will be fine soon
Silly girl,how are you??
I miss you so much
I do hope you will know how do I feel

"When you come to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. "
I come to the end
The end that is very dangerous,painful and torturing
I must hang on there to survive
I must do something to increase my perseverance
I must not give up

Good night,dear readers
Have a nice dream

Perseverance

"If one dream should fall and break into a thousand pieces, never be afraid to pick one of those pieces up and begin again. "

My dream fall and break into a thousand pieces
I must pick one of those pieces up and begin everything again
I hope I'm strong enough for this
I need to stand strong for every obstacles
I have to endure pain that occur in my life
I wont give up
I will rebuild my dream
From pieces to a complete and wonderful dream
And I will make my dream come true!

What Should I Do??

Hmmm..
Things getting more complicated now between you and me
I guess you decided not to reply my text or have any contact with me
I understand that
Sorry for making you suffer
I will respect your decision
I will do as what I suppose to do from now on
Im willing to sacrifice to see the future
But no matter what,
I will always care about you
Secretly and silently
I hope you will be fine from now on
I will believe in myself that you will be fine
I know,for you it's not worthy for me to sacrifice for you
But you are wrong.
You are the most valuable person in my life,
And I still hold my promise to you.
I will wait till the 7th years come
Take care,silly girl..

Im going back to hostel by tonight
I have to say that college's life is getting more busy
Have bunch of test waiting for me and few assignments booking me
I hope I will be fine with all this obstacles
Loves and studies
Hope that I can get through this without any problems

Im Back!!

Hey guys,
Im back from my Journey of Life
Cant have much time to update the blog after im back from National Service.
Life seems to be getting more busy
Well,I should just post a short summarize of my life now

As you guys know,
Im just back from Sibu,Sarawak
Went there for my National Service at Kem Junaco Park,Sibu,Sarawak
That camp is kinda nice
Area = VERY wide!!!
Have lots of activities over there
Learn many things,
And meet lots of friends from KL and Sarawak too
Cant post much bout this because Im lazy to do it
No time for me to post a very long story of my NS life
But,from this experience
I can say that we should go for this NS
You will learn what's the meaning of teamworks,friendships,character buildings and many more.
I have to say that,I love my Bravo company so much!!
The teamworks we have,will not able to be match by Alpha,Charlie and Delta
I cried for twice because of friends doing perlepasan awal
I learned the meaning of the importance of friendship
I learned things bout myself and others people through character buildings.

Well,Im back now
I will practice everything that I learned from NS in my life now
Now,
I started my college life in Tunku Abdul Rahman College,Kuala Lumpur
Taking Diploma in Internet Technology in 1st Year
Having lot of things to do
Need to catch up lots of lesson
Moved to hostel to make things more easier
College's life is very tiring to be honest

I think this will be the end of today post
Dear Vad,Becca,Pui Kei,Lai Yee and many others friends,
Im back with the new me!!
Have a nice day :)

1 more day

Seems like I will only have 1 more day in KL
Silly girl,sorry :(
You text me
But I dont know what to reply
You told me that Im a very good friend for you
Honestly,I want to try very best of me to be your good friend
But no matter how hard I try,you will always get hurt
I feel sorry for this
I feel so guilty for hurting you,my lovely silly girl
I feel that Im not worth for you to call as "good" friend
But no matter what,you trust me that Im a good friend
From this,I really hope I will change after NS training
I really hope so
Haih,
I dont know how I feel right now
I just miss your smile,your voice and your care for me
Will we see each other before I leave KL??
I really hope you will know how do I feel now
:(

Frustrated

Haih
Silly girl,
Sorry for every problem that I had brought to you
I dont know what else I can say
I just feel so sorry for you and sorry of myself
I feel ashamed of myself
I promised not to hurt you anymore but I keep on hurting you
I dont know how to express my feelings
I feel so frustrated
Because of all things that happened,
I had lost my appetite to eat
I rarely eat my lunch and barely eat my dinner for almost 3 weeks
I had lost my sense of humour
I dont know how to make jokes like before this
I laughed when friends make jokes,
But in my heart, I cant find the real funny in me
I lost the enjoyment of life as a human being
I cant feel any feelings
All the feelings,just come and go that fast and easily
I dont know what to do
I feel so lonely this time
:(

Hmm

I dont know how do I feel now
U free 2mrw but cant come due to transport problem
We argued because of this small matter
I feel so sorry,silly girl
Sorry for being so silly boy
:(

1st Day

Today is your 1st day of college life
Didnt talk much to you although I wish to
Dont feel like want to disturb you
Hmmm
How should I know things about you then??
Maybe I will just rely on facebook
Only few more days left for me
Really wish to have a good time with you before I leave

College College College

So,you are going to start your college life tomorrow
Which means I will have less time chatting with you
Hmmm
Let's see how we can get through this
I believe we can still close with each other although you will be busy
God,please lend me some strength to get through this
I dont want to feel moody because of no time chatting with her
I wont be like the old me
I want to overcome every kind of situation with my positive thinking
:)

Okay :)

Honestly,
I really want you to understand
Im not forcing myself
I really want to fix everything
I just want you to trust me
Thx for your answer
Now I know you trust me
I feel much more better and more motivated
Believe me,
I will learn how to love myself before I love others
Thx silly girl..

Trust

All I need is you to trust me
Maybe there is no any progress for my changes
But I really trying my best to do
I just want you to trust me
I will feel much more better and more motivate if I know you trust me
I dont want to give up :(

haih

Im a loser
I lose you as my lover and almost lose you as friend
I dont want this to happen
I really want to get through this together with you
Please,I beg you
Please do it for me too
:(

Running Away

Sorry if I make you feel hard this few days
I dont want to run away anymore
I just want to fix it together with you
I want to face it together with you
This is what I want to do before I leave
I really dont want to leave with guilty

Hmmm

Didnt sms you this whole day
Maybe is because I dont want to disturb you
Always be the 1 who sms you 1st is making me feel like Im very annoying
haih :(
I dont know how to face this
I dont want to keep running away :(

:(

I know Im being selfish and desperate
All I want is just to make you feel comfortable talking to me
I dont have much time left
I just want to make it before I go
But there is too many obstacle
I dont know what to do
:(

Hmmm

Im officially resigned from Daily Kopitiam
I will back to my normal life
Sitting in front of pc for the whole day
Haih
I will have more time to communicate with you
But I scare I will make you feel that Im annoying
Hmmm
I will just follow the flow of situation

Just view back Kyle's Blog
Saw some old pic that make me remind of you
I do miss every sweet memories we had last time
I miss you
:(

:)

Last night,you told me today will be your last day working
I planned of passing by your shop,
Maybe just to take a look at you
Is been 3 months I didnt see you face to face
I passed by your shop today
I purposely walk there
I saw you,but not so clearly because it is dark in your shop
So,I decided to continue my walk to work
But at the end,
I make up my mind to just go in and see you
I sms you,but you didnt reply
I thought of just leave that place
But thx God,
When my bus reach,you finally replied my text
I think this is the chance for me to see you
I lied to you bout breakfast
Im not really want to eat breakfast
I had lost my appetite to eat recently
All I want is just to see you
I really miss you so much

Looking at your smile make me feel so glad and maybe,a bit sad
You didnt talk to me much
But I dont blame you
Maybe you still feel uncomfortable talking to me
This time visit,
Will be the 1st and the last time for me to see you
I dont know when I will be able to see you
Im leaving soon
I just hope to see you in a better way before I leave
But only this is what God can give to me
I will just have to follow the fate

I will remember your smile on today when Im at Sarawak
I really will remember it
This blog will let you know my feeling in this remaining time
This blog will be a present for you before I leave
This blog will let you realize Im really growing up for you
I hope you will be always thinking of me after reading this blog
Dear Silly Girl,I will miss you so much :)

Hmmm

Things seems fine now
We are starting to know each other like before this
I just hope it will be improve more
In my mind now,
I doesnt think of chance to be your lover
All I want is just to have you in my life
Others thing,just let the fate to decide it
I hope you will understand this
:)

Lied

I lied to you again
About forgetting you all after going NS
Im sorry for hurting you
But I dont have choice
All I can do is just to love you silently
Sorry
:(

Haih

All I need is just a chance to prove to you tat I had changed
Why you dont want to give me a chance?
I waited for a month
But you came back and told me you have boyfriend
Why you dont want to give me a chance?
You promised you will wait for me to change
But why you cant do as what you had promised?
Lai Yee,my heart feel so pain
:(

Hmmm

You said you are actually care bout me
But for me,I cant feel that
If you really care bout me,
Do you know my feelings right now?
I just want we chat like before this
I want we get back the comfortable feeling with each other
If you really care,
Why cant you try to open your heart for me again?
Why you want to keep running away from this problem?
Do you really want to let it happen till forever?
I just want you to understand my feeling right now
:(

Not Enough Time

I dont have much time anymore
All I want is just to make you feel comfortable talking to me
But you said you dont have choice
Cant you just open your heart for me?
I really need it
I feel so hurt
Can stop running away from this problem?
Can we solve it before I leave??
Please :(

Leaving Soon

Im leaving soon
27th of March and I will be going to Sarawak
I dont have much time now
I realize I will have a lot of things to be prepare before I depart to Sarawak
I wish I can see you
Is been like 2 months plus I didnt see you face to face
I really want to see you
If I go to Sarawak,
I wont be able to see you for 3 months
And,
It will be 6 months for me for not seeing you
I miss you,Lai Yee
I just want to see you
:(

Hmmm

I feel so lonely all this time
Thinking of you is really killing me
I do feel like want to make myself get into coma
I really feel like want to end my pain
I dont want to care about anything
I just want to sleep and wont wake up for a long time
The love we had are really killing me
I really cant forget about our story
You kissed my right hand
Everytime when I look at my right hand,
My heart feel so pain and sad
I feel that you are with me,
But your heart is not with me
And your love is not with me

My heart feel so pain
I have to pretend that I dont love you anymore in front of you
I have to pretend that I really let go of you
I have to pretend all this just to make you feel happy with your love one
It is all because I love you
I really want you to know my feeling
But I cant
I dont want to destroy your happiness
I have no choice but to keep it in my heart
:(

My Life Without You

This is a blog that only me myself know the existence of it
This will be the place for me to voice out my feeling
Is better if there's no one know about this blog

Haih
Where should I start 1st??
I dont know actually
Things had gone very far
I will just make a conclusion
You have a boyfriend now
:(

I told you that I will let go of you
This is the only way for me to love you
But honestly to tell you,
I cant let go of you
I really cant let go of you

It is so hard for me to be 2 different person
I have to be a guy without any problem during working time
But at the same time,
I feel so depressed with what had happened
I have to act like nothing happened at all

I really hope you will come back to me
I cant live my life normally
:(